My Wonderful Job
by LadyJazzy90
Summary: Sylvester rants about his job and his feline co-workers in particular.


_Note: Sylvester, Sylvia, Penelope, George, and Benny don't belong to me. Instead, they belong to the Warner Brothers._

I'm starting to hate this damn job so much! I don't know where to begin.

First of all, the job description is okay. I'm not going to tell any details about the company I work for, all I'm gonna say is that I work at some business company where all of us have our separate offices and do administrative work. It's boring and repetitive as hell, but its okay. The reason I'm starting to hate this job is because of my freaking co-workers' annoying habits! I can honestly write a novel about these cats, but I'm just going to tell about things that stood out.

**Co-worker #1: Sylvia**. She's hot and nice, but she is annoying. Sure, she gets her work done quickly and efficiently, but when she's done, she stops by my office to see if I want to hang out with her. Every freakin' day. I told her nicely that I'm not interested, but she still stops by my office anyway. I can tell she's trying to get my attention, but it's not helping. One day, she even wore a dressy blouse that was showing her cleavage just to get my attention. It got the other male felines attention though. If she doesn't back of one these days, I just have to tell her bluntly that I'm not interested in yellow cat chicks. Some other complaints about her are that she spends too much time in the bathroom doing her makeup, she texts on her phone too damn much (she texts even at meetings!), and she always wear a stupid blue bow on her neck. You're like twenty-five, you're not ten!

**Co-worker #2: Penelope**. She also has some somewhat annoying habits and is a little weird, but she is not as bad as Sylvia. Out of all of my co-workers, I like and can tolerate her the best because she has common sense (unlike those other morons), knows current events, interested in political and religious topics, and not interested in that who's dating who or who's breaking up with who crap. I also like her exotic slight French accent.

My main complaint with her is some of her choices of music. When it's her turn to play her music on a particular Friday, she always picks the strangest stuff. Some of it is actually not bad, some of it is actually relaxing, but the others are just plain awful. One Friday, she played some music that she called French rap. Boy, the crap was painful to hear!

**Co-worker #3: Claude**. This feline is one of those felines that need to stop being a nervous cat and learn how to take a chill pill. Every time I see him, he is either anxious or paranoid about something small and stupid. I understand that he is concerned about his health and well-being, but he doesn't have to wear plastic gloves everyday to work. He doesn't have to try and disinfect the office when someone leaves and flips out when someone move his crap.

He needs to stop reading those conspiracy theories crap so much! No wonder he's paranoid. He also needs to stop telling us that catnip is bad for us. None one cares about his opinion.

**Co-worker #4: George**. Like Penny, he's cool and fun to hang out with. I enjoy his political and spiritual debates with Penny and me. I also had a blast playing video games with him in the boss office before the assistant caught us and kicked us out. After Penny, he is my second choice of being tolerated the most.

My main complaint with him is that he owes me ten bucks for a cigarette pack that he took without asking. I know it was him because we are the only cats on this job who smokes.

**Co-worker#5: Benny**. He was cool and fun to hang out with at first, but he is starting to annoy me. One thing that is pissing me off about him is the fact he calls me George. First of all, my name isn't George, it's Sylvester! Plus, I don't even look like George. Can't you see that I'm a bit taller than him? I also have a red nose, while George has a black nose. Another thing is that I don't think he can drive. This fat cat nearly rear-ended me not once, but twice because he was busy eating a freaking sandwich.

He needs to stop hanging out with Speedy and his cousin of his because almost every time he comes from those mice to work, he is high on catnip! He also needs to stop getting high on catnip everyday because it is starting to affect his memory and work abilities.

I'm done writing at the moment. I need to go out and get a beer.


End file.
